Now a days, it is difficult to find a decent copy of the Farmers Almanac to predict the weather, but I still trust the horses when they start playing and trotting around. That always means a storm is a brewin. So we decided to combine a few things of the past and like the "Twelve Days of Christmas" in the snow packed Mt. Nebo winter we hope for, and gathered together an Autumn "Twelve Days of Fall" as a little well.....Foreplay... for moisture for our Juab County Farmers even though State Policitcans may never have been taught history in the fourth grade that Utah has and always will be without water! If a Nephi leader says that, they or either not from here or just plain liars with their own motive of taking water from our ranchers. And if you ask the Pioneers of York, they would think the water leaders were "Nicca Poops" and nearby Doc Steele would say things I can't print here. Since 1776, we had barrels of water underground, but have too many people with straws, and a new subdivision may not water a lawn, but some of those folks shower and flush toilets! And Yes, we do use water for those. Bring your own water from California or your own beer from Milwaukee. We aint got "plenty of water" here. We did spend 20 million of taxpayer money for distribution of water, but not for pumping sand or another Sewer lagoon!
On the 12th day of the Eurocentrically imposed pre-winter festival, my potential-acquaintance-girlfriend-survivor gave to me,
"TWELVE DAYS OF FALL MY LOVE GAVE TO ME"
TWELVE females reclaiming their inner warrior through ritual drumming,
ELEVEN pipers piping (plus the 18-member pit orchestra made of up of members in good standing of the Musicians Equity Union as called for in their Wasp union contract even though they all will not be asked to play a note at Juab High School),
TEN melanin-deprived testosterone-poisoned scions of the patriarchal class system playing leap the frog with the remaining Unicorns of Levan,
NINE persons engaged in rhythmic self expression,
EIGHT economically disadvantaged female persons stealing milk-products from the enslaved Bovine-Americans,
SEVEN endangered swans swimming on federally protected wetlands at Fish Springs,
SIX enslaved fowl-Americans producing stolen nonhuman animal products, at Nephi Pack,
FIVE golden symbols of culturally sanctioned enforced domestic incarceration,
(Note: after a lunatic from an animals rights gang threatened to throw red paint on my Mink shed, the calling birds, French hens and partridges have been reintroduced to their native habitat in Mills, America and the remaining gift package has been revised.
FOUR hours of recorded whale songs from the ones still submerged in the dry Mona Revivor (where we used to park and watch the submarine races in the 1960's,
THREE deconstructionist poets,
TWO calendars of tree hugger nudes printed on recycled processed tree carcasses,
and a Spotted Owl Activist chained to an old-growth apple tree on Jones' Knoll off the Loop Road.
In my nearly 50 years of public service and Volunteer work that both Obama's claim to have given freely and now millionaire's, I have been insulted by about every type of sentient creature on earth, and I now have to justify my mere existence to some of the far left "mis-informed" or stupid people. In this case, please read with humor in your middle brain, and giggle if your body and inner soul allows you to. In the meantime, I have moved my mink shed out near Broadhead Ranch, where we have cameras on Cedar Posts and fully armed Scarecrows that automatically shoot at carriers of Red Paint; those who shoot horses and cows, etc. The computer controlled shooter used to be a phone caller for "You may be entitled to significant money for being shot by a Scarecrow" and says he has a good attorney now in a secret Federal Housing Unit in the Swasey Mountains. Not sure how to get his Mercedes there for him.
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